Mon Mar 08:
Happy International Women’s Day, Woman!
🎶 I get up, and nothing gets me down. You got it tough, I see the something go round, And I know, baby just how you feel. You gotta roooooll with the punches and get to what’s real. Can you see me standing here I got my back against the something machine. Can’t you see what I mean. Might as well jump! 🎶
Do you remember the movie Jumpin’ Jack Flash where Whoopie was trying to figure out the words to the song of the same name? It was so funny. At one point, she said, “Speak English.”
Well … Monday morning came and went without issue. And I felt pretty good when I woke up – Jump was already playing in my head. Thanks Van Halen! Maybe the tapping worked, but that’s too subtle for me. Next time I feel the feeling, I’m just gonna literally 🎶 roooooll with the punches till I get to what’s real. 🎶 I have to get an automatic rolling punching machine.
I am happy to say that this feeling of anxiety doesn’t ever prevent me from doing what I must do (unless it’s going outside), so I can deal with it. I should stop wishing that I never felt it in the first place and rest in the knowledge that I will do what I gotta do anyway. 🎶 Cause I am a champion, my friend, and I’ll keep on fighting till the end 🎶 🙂
Someone said, let fear push you from behind instead of stand in front of you. That’s what I’m doing with my anxiety. I got you beat! 🎶 Hit me with your best shot. Fire away! 🎶
Only eight people responded to my BPM Interdepartmental survey – That’s a 38% turn out which makes me sad, but I’m trying to keep things in perspective. I mean, we are a bit better than we were when I started, so change is happening. It’s just not happening as quickly as I would like. I will try not to expose myself to anything negative because I’ll get discouraged (for like a minute 🙂 ). Of course, I’m not the type of person to just do my job and screw off until the next day – I carry this shit with me. You’d think it was my company. Fuck!!! Breathe – I need to lower my expectations of others then I will never be disappointed. jk – that’s my self-pity talking.
It’s so problematic for me to regulate my feelings. Maybe I’m just taking the survey turnout hard because it’s Monday. If I was high-high, then things might not feel so bad. (Eruption by Van Halen came on JIT and it made me feel better. I just had to sit back and listen. Rock on!) Music makes my world go around! I’d like to think that Spotify can sense my mood and play exactly what I need when I need it 🙂
🎶 Don’t stop believing. Hold on to the feeling! 🎶
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