Sun Nov 14:

Red Rover. Red Rover. Send Sales data over. Right fuckin’ now!

My dad always told me, “You should judge a person’s character based on how they behave when they aren’t getting what they want.” Someone reminded me of this today. It wasn’t me – I hope I don’t act douchy when I am not getting what I want.

Got some advice from my IT guy! I like talking to people who help me see things from different perspectives. Our CA is also like that sometimes and so is Jer. And so is The Boy! And our Sales Director is great at explaining to me things so I understand them. I am happy to ask for and make use of feedbacks and opinions and ideas. I am happy that people feel comfortable sharing their headspace with me. I feel I am mostly agreeable, except for when I am Hulk angry, but I quickly return to human form accept and apologize for stuff Hulk did. AND I find that as I get older, Hulk doesn’t show up as often, but when he does, you’ll know.

I just keep getting betterer and betterer as I age. Yippie!!! I am trying really hard not to eat anymore junk today, unfortunately the night is still young.

I read somewhere, “More important than your time is your attention.” I don’t understand why they are saying that, if something is taking your attention, is it not also taking your time? Whatever! Maybe the person was trying to say you should be careful with what you give your attention to? Suppose I say shit that people think is stupid but seemed wonderful to me in the moment?

I’m making mistakes in my journal again … putting apostrophes where they don’t belong, adding extra spaces, spelling words wrong – but at least I know now that it has nothing to do with my memory. I woke up with all intentions to study Python but then I felt shitty, so I went back to bed. Then I woke up and did my assignment. As things get complicated I have to dedicate more time to completing my homework closer to when I finish the lectures otherwise I need to review everything.

Dee painted that rock many years ago and paper got stuck to it somehow.

This is my beautiful leaf today – I forgot I had it in my pocket and was disappointed, a part of me expected it to stay the same. If I didn’t see it yesterday, would I still think it’s beautiful? Likely no. This leaf will never return to its former beauty but fallen leafs aren’t people – you’re still alive, even though you might feel dead and you got lots of living to do; One day at a time.

I am currently on a 75$/week food budget like the boys. And I am still on a cash diet but using my credit card because if I use my debit I’m missing out on the rewards and cash back, which makes no sense. The added benefit of using my card for everything too is I will be able to track my spending much easier. This is good.

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