Animal Sex Crossing

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Today I found a poetry jazz bar/cafe – I wanted to go this evening … got dressed then changed my mind. I feel bloated, crampy and gross. I prefer the body I had before all this cancer prevention surgery. When I get this shit sorted I better not have any more lady part issues or I’m gonna fuckin’ burn down Toronto!

I feel beyond frustrated. No one’s gonna want me bleeding all over them and their furniture. This is bad for my mental health! So much for November being a good month! (heavy sigh!)

My ready for sex face/outfit!

Anyhow … enough about that part of me life! Since I don’t want to think about sex, I’ve been thinking about why, in the past, I’ve put up with men and their maladaptive-ness. For example:

Octopus guy – why didn’t I end the date. I could have gone and sat somewhere else or I could have left.
Drunkin’ ass grabber guy – I could have walked away from him, nothing was stopping me. Why didn’t I?
There are lots of other examples where, at that moment, I couldn’t bring myself to leave – I don’t even remember if the thought crossed my mind.

I got reacquainted with a guy I met way back when I first started dating, circa 2015. He remembered details from the one date we went on – I told him why I was turned off, and he said he’s not that guy anymore. We’ll see. Maybe!

Finally made it to Bata Shoe Museum for my artist date. It was whatever. I got to see back-in-the-day footwear from different countries – Africa, India, and China. They also had an ’80s exhibit and lots of sneakers …