Well, well, well. Hello!
Often, I come across profiles where the guy is all about his kids. He says, “I live for my children.” “My greatest joy is my kids.” Etc. This is after they say their children are over 18 … Fuck you! Fuck your kids. Next!
Then I feel bad but only for a few seconds.
Another favourite is “My son/daughter is the best thing I ever did,” with a picture of the child. Really!? That kid looks like a 92 chromosome baby that shoulda miscarried! OMG! Samantha Williams! What is wrong with you? I wonder if I’m wired wrong, but only for a few seconds. Then I laugh and carry on. Horrid, I am. Next!
By the time our children hit their tweens (hate that word), they have rich lives filled with friends and fun activities. They’re doing their own thing – learning, growing, n shit. That’s how it’s supposed to be. Get a life of your own, for Christ’s sake. I wanna know what you’re doing.
Running Outta Options
Well … that dwindles the pool by 20-30 percent because I also don’t want anyone with young children. Minus another 50% for all the religious types. Can you imagine me dating a Christian? OMG, that would be a disaster. LMFAO. (UGH! If only I could laugh my fat off). I digress.
… Then add another 7% for the ones who don’t drink, smoke weed or do drugs. Like WTF! And we’ve also got to cross off the cigarette smokers – ewwww. What’s left … I’m down to ~ 10%. Then, minus another 5% for the ones I don’t find attractive and another 2% for the self-proclaimed “free thinkers” who don’t think freely. That’s 3%.
I’m going to be single and sexless for a bit longer. However, unlike before, I will continue to focus on my romantic life because it is an essential part of my composition, and I feel ready to find MY Guy.
I met with my writing friends virtually last night. It is always a pleasure. We will hang out in person at the end of the month, and I’m looking forward to that. I also have a few events with Sharon at the end of May.
Tyrant prizes are on soft paper; no longer in my head. Stay tuned.
Fri May 10
© 2024 Samantha Williams. All Rights Reserved.
Photo by JC Gellidon on Unsplash
