Hello! Did you know they have machines to polish wine glasses? They can polish shoes too.
Also, I got retractable deer antler implants. That’s why I couldn’t talk to you on Friday. Cool right! My new retractable antler implants also act as defence mechanisms; for example, if someone is sitting on top of me strangling me the antlers can come out of any part of my body that will do the most damage to the perp. Yay!
Minor improvement: After having a chat with Dre, I will upgrade my antlers to self-cleaning because bloody antlers going back into your body are gross. (I mean, I’m cool with it but makes sense from a hygenic standpoint.)
Do you remember the time I got fake stiletto nails and took them off within a few days cause I didn’t like how it felt when I’d scratch an itch? It was the strangest sensation, but not as bad as when I was on those anti-depressants and I’d be walking but couldn’t feel my feet touch the ground. That must be what walking on clouds is like.
Today in my PMI course I learned how to create a pitch – which is a great transferable skill. I also learned about UI/UX stuff. I don’t see myself needing that.
In case you didn’t know, I also wake up to hymns playing in my head.
🎶
Then sings my soul, my Savior God to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
🎶
I was watching a movie called Pari (2018) last night, and the girl came to live with this guy after they found her chained in a hut. She was sitting on his furniture and sleeping in his bed AND cutting her toenails in his bed, and all I could think was, Why hasn’t she taken a shower and changed her clothes yet? That really bothered me.
When I watch true crime shows and see people living double, or quadruple lives, I get tense and feel so stressed – how are you comfortable with lying and cheating and robbing and murdering. And friends, family, co-workers, personal and business partners are always shocked.
“OMG I can’t believe So And So did that. S/He was such a pillar of the community and a prominent member of our church congregation. They volunteered at soup kitchens, housed the homeless, fed strays, adopted unwanted children (only to violate them but that’s why we’re here) … blah, blah.
Can you ever really know somebody? Like really truly know them!
Do I even really know me?
Sometimes, more often than I’d like, I think about how wrong humans are. How awful we treat each other. I don’t want to be cynical or more realistic than I need to be. But I feel like I’m approaching the event horizon and it sucks. Royally!
I’m gonna become a cult leader who has all the solutions for making the world a better place. But seriously, it feels like there’s less and less good for me to focus on. Except for when I see mountains and trees and flowers and good-looking dicks. Anyway …
Speaking of good-looking dicks … Jer and Bossman are away this week – I have the office all to my sex worker self. Oh yeah!
Matt: Mom, I’m going to a party tonight with outside friends
Me: What does that mean?
Matt: I’m going with my usual friends to a non-usual friend party.
Me: Oh. Are you coming home tonight?
Matt: Yes!
Me. Don’t do anything stupid!
Matt: I won’t!
Me: And don’t let anything stupid, do you! (He looks at me puzzled, then laughs.)
Me: I mean it!
Matt: OK!
I’ve been drinking cerasee – it’s tea made from karela leaves. Also, saw Talk To Me (2023) and Last Voyage of the Demeter (2023) at a theatre in Scarborough over the weekend. BTW: I will take a break from true crime as well.
Good night Jesus. Good night Grammarly. Good night ChatGPT. Good night Moon Man who kidnapped me and wanted me to make moon pies for the rest of my life. I forgive you. Good night floor. Good night ceiling. Good night good night.
Mon Aug 28
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