Sweep. Sweep. Boom.

“Hey hon, do you think I’d look better with bigger man boobs?” Said no one ever. (I hope)

I’m liking my new trainer – even though the stuff is somewhat repetitive, it’s focused on muscle building, I feel. You already know how much I hate squats, and variations of squats are still squats; So far, I’ve refrained from breaking his legs, but it’s taking all my willpower …

BTW: The light in the sauna is out, which I like.

I have project management shit to do at work! Yay! Did I ever tell you I love working with our Sales Director? Well! You gonna hear it again. I love working with our Sales Director!

Also, did I ever tell you how much I love organizing information? It makes me feel alive! Yea!

I tell all my hoes, “Rake it up. Break it down. Bag it up.” Fuck it up, fuck it up. Back it up, back it up. Rake it up, rake it up. I made love to a stripper. First I had to tip her. 20, 000 ones. She said I’m that nigga.

Rake It Up – Yo Gotti

Seeing as how I hoe alone, I’ma have to rake, break and bag this shit on my own. Do you remember the movie American Pimp?

I have an idea for how to make curling fun: Rig mines at random spots under the ice and when people, brooms or stones go over them there’s an explosion, which sets off all the other mines. F1 and Curling are now Blood Sports.

I’m gonna turn every sport into mayhem. Maybe I will do cricket next – the guys were out playing today. How can I make cricket bloody? … Instead of a ball, maybe they throw specially made grenades with nails and shards of glass in them for maximum damage. You lose an arm, an eye, too bad. You gotta keep playing till you’re dead.

OMG, I find that extremely funny. Do you think there’s something wrong with me?

Well … I gotta go. I’m too sexy for this conversation.

Mon Mar 21, 2022