Journal Entry – Thu Sep 24

One more day to vacation 🙂

How do you domestic abuse proof your children – from becoming perps or victims?

I love the words in Every Kind of People by Robert Palmer. I’m gonna start breaking shit if these fruit flies don’t leave me alone – Maybe I need to get rid of the boys and the flies will go with them. What do you think? I will try trapping them tomorrow (the fruit flies, not the boys)

We might be close to a four-day work week for real. I don’t know how close though. I think earlier this year, or maybe it was last year, Microsoft tested four-day work weeks in Japan and they found that people were more productive and had a better sense of general well being, I can’t remember what the percentage was that productivity went up. Four day work weeks and universal income – hopefully, and it will be all because of COVID.

Our US client didn’t show up for the check-in AGAIN and the other one cancelled our meeting for tomorrow. Today, while we were waiting for the client, who didn’t show up, I got to see beautiful Sofia again and our CFO said if he has to change our pricing model one more time he is going to commit suicide – I was laughing my head off. I mean, I figured he was joking.

Then he asked about software for monitoring people’s activity. My boss said that’s not how he wants to run the company and that there is a level of responsibility/liability on the company’s part because if they find something they have to report or do something about it.

Personally, I wouldn’t work for an organization that monitored me – provided I’d know about it, but I don’t think the company needs to disclose anything. Plus, it’s not like we are working for the government doing some high security clearance requirement, save the world work – monitoring in that case, I would understand and it makes complete sense.

Secondly, you should hire people that share the organization’s values and you should trust the people you hire, until you have reason not to. I love where I work but if they were to change policy I’d be out, because at it’s very core, monitoring implies a lack of trust and I find that insulting. I am passionate about my work, and whether paid or unpaid my work ethic is the same. So FUCK YOU if you don’t trust me! (breathe)

I scored 120 points in one of my scrabble games with QUITTED 🙂 – That was the highlight of my day. I feel like that should make me sad but I am ok with it.

I’ve been reflecting and I think I do binge eat, and drink – like eating a bag of gummies, I think qualifies. I read that alcoholics are also people who binge drink, this is why I can go for months and months and months, sometimes years without drinking and because I can go that long it is difficult for me to accept so … I am still not ready to call myself an alcoholic.

First, I have to know how long a typical binge drinker can go without drinking and still be considered an alcoholic.

I also need to come to terms with what it means to be an alcoholic – I always felt like alcoholics were the stumbling, blackout drunks, the kind of people that need an intervention – I’ve never been that. But if binge drinking counts, then … I am (that was difficult to write). But I still feel like I can stop when I’m ready, which I guess could be a form of denial. So I am still not ready to go to any group meetings but maybe I should – that may be the best place to gain some insight …

And then I will fall in love with my sponsor and be drink free, then we will get married and I will wake up one day and change my mind and wonder why I got married in the first place and I will look at his annoying face and everything he does will disgust me and I will start drinking again and then we will get a divorce and then I will go back to AA and fall in love with my new sponsor and be drink free and get married … FML

Cheers! 🙂

Feature Photo Credit: @marla via Twenty20

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