Data Analysis at Work

You know how there are signs all over the place on the TTC to give up your seats, the blue ones at least, to the elderly, pregnant or people with disabilities? Those signs don’t work. After completing a survey commissioned by the TTC, I have a proposal for the elderly because most others will ask to sit. Process:

  1. Passenger pays fare
  2. If bus/streetcar – Driver hands them a taser
  3. If train/light rail – Passenger stops at a vending machine, swipes/inserts/taps Presto card, and receives a taser
  4. Passenger is free to use the taser on anyone who should not be occupying the blue seat.
    1. Disclaimer: The TTC cannot control who gets tased, and the device is not AI-equipped to assist in the proper determination. It is up to the carrier to use their discretion. The TTC and their affiliates do not endorse or recommend tasing pregnant, disabled, other elderly folks or children ages 2 to 5. However, it all depends on how badly the carrier wishes to sit. 
    2. Each taser contains three cartridges. If carrier wishes to switch seats, they are welcome to tase up to three times on a one-way trip.
  5. Passengers must return the device once they’ve reached their destination.
    1. Drop boxes are visible on subway platforms and at bus/streetcar stops.

NOTE: All tasers are free of charge.

I’m pretty sure I wrote a microburst about a laminating machine salesman, but I can’t find the story. I can’t even remember all my stories – that’s why giving them their own post is so slow. That taser story above could probably use its own too. But these things usually come to me when I sit down to write – if they come before, I will record a few keywords in my book

Do you think they have Down Syndrome sex workers? 

Good night!

Wed Nov 02, 2022

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