It’s still too cold to play handball.
Earlier this week, Dre told me something like, “If you could see the things you do from my perspective, you’d question your sanity too.” I laughed really loud and also howled, as a werewolf does at the moon. I think at the time I was making random noises with my mouth and flopping about on the couch, as a fish out of water does on the sandy shore of what’s left of its life.
It would be helpful if I could change my behaviour as effortlessly as hitting a button and receiving a software update. My impulsiveness and suggestiveness, among other things, get me into food and money overconsumption problems often. BUT I’m not giving up.
As you know, I always wake up with a full tank of willpower. Today is the day I conquer ME! By evening, I’m running on fumes because that is when I will make all the wrong decisions. Tomorrow is the day I conquer ME! So … what’s guzzlin’ my self-control fuel?
I’ll be watching a movie, commercial, a billboard, a scene playing out in my head – then I get the, “Oooh! I want that!” feeling. From there, I could end up eating and/or drinking and/or buying. Yesterday, I ate cake and also drank Pepsi. (I wonder if that’s why I didn’t feel like talking last night).
While I was purchasing the cakes, I got chocolate and vanilla cause I couldn’t decide; a tiny voice kept saying, “What are you doing? Put it back now! Put it back!” I just ignored future me! Her voice needs to be deafening to save me from myself! I am disaster number 502!
I can’t give up on me though. Ain’t nobody else to pass the baton to in this relay race with versions of myself (that sounds like poem material). The race just keeps going; every time I get over that finish line, there’s another one I gotta reach with a better me.
Spy Code Time:
Statement: The rock-a-bye cradle is occupied by The Cat In The Hat Response: Dr.Seuss' Berceuse This message will self-destruct (as a Human does)
I was surprised to not see the guys out playing cricket – then I remembered. Since I changed the rules and turned it into a blood sport, they’re likely all heavily maimed or dead. That’s too bad.
Dee stopped by to help Matt with filming his latest thing. I was flabbergasted.
Did you know that Rats do not partake in rat races?