Known as the class clown
I'm always goofing around
Regularly, I can be found:
Laughing at stupid students
Exercising imprudence
Poking jokes at our drill teacher
He resembles a bald, fatphilic creature
Ms.Kitty, my homeroom teacher,
She's frequently mad at me - that's her husband, see.
Nepotism isn't dead! - But I don't care one bit;
Ms.Kitty's breath smells like an armpit.
My parents are upset too -
I don't listen when they tell me what to do.
Teachers show students no respect.
So, from me, they have none to get.
Supporting the bourgeoisie,
That does not play well with me.
We must take care of the working class
Ms.Kitty, and the establishment, can kiss my ass.
~~~
I left the school grounds the other day
To meet a few proletarian friends in the alleyway
Assisting the working class with their uprising
If you knew me, that would not be surprising
We protested past my school -
Stupid idea, I'm such a fool.
Ms.Kitty sent a guard to grab me.
Then lectured the class on my behalf.
"I told you not to hang with those rats.
Silly boy, you're from a family of aristocrats.
Rats infest our homes and carry disease.
Why help them spread their propaganda?
Remember what happened to Amanda?
Do you want your parents sending you to Uganda?"
"I think we should share our wealth.
I understand how Karl Marx felt.
And I know how my rat friends feel."
To the collective humanity, I must appeal!!!"
"Boy! Stop with your tomfoolery.
Pay attention to your lessons.
To be at this prestigious boarding school,
you should consider it a blessing."
I'd better not catch any of you with those rats
I'll tell your parents, and you'll go to bed with scraps"
~~~
You might be thinking that was the end.
But stubborn me, I took off again.
Got caught and received another lecture.
Tired of Ms.Kitty's conjecture,
I told her where to stick her lecture.
"You're the one filling our heads with trash.
I love my friends, those proletarian rats.
When I grow up, I'm going to find you,
and your kind. AND for the record Ms.Kitty,
the beatdown you'll get won't be pretty.
Never again will I be quiet. AND by the way,
Ms.Kitty, you and your husband need to go on a diet."
"Alright! Since wearing a dunce cap won't do,
Seems I'll have to beat the stubborn rudeness out of you.
Here's a lesson you'll never forget.
Drop your pants; I'm about to work up a sweat."
This is a ekphrastic poem based on The Naughty Puss by Louis Wain. (feature photo). Based on the dVerse prompt, we weren’t allowed to use “cat” in the piece.
© 2024 Samantha Williams. All Rights Reserved.
4 Comments
I fun write about the rebellious youth, most of us grow out of that (including the proletarian rats), and I wouldn’t be too surprise in finding the narrators becoming another bourgeois teacher a few years later.
🙏 lol! Right! We grow up, assimilate and try to forget (or we assimilate because we’ve already forgotten!)
You had me laughing with this one! I especially laughed at “Ms.Kitty’s breath smells like an armpit.” I’ve had that teacher! And that cat!
“Why help them spread their propaganda?
Remember what happened to Amanda?
Do you want your parents sending you to Uganda?”
“Tired of Ms.Kitty’s conjecture,
I told her where to stick her lecture.
‘You’re the one filling our heads with trash.
I love my friends, those proletarian rats.’”
And of course “AND by the way,
Ms.Kitty, you and your husband need to go on a diet.”
You’ve captured the ornery class clown quite well, reminding me of some of the standoffs I’ve witnessed between disrespectful students and disrespectful teachers.
Thank you, Melissa! I’m glad it made you laugh!