My mom sent me to the store For eggs, coffee and more Instead of going straight there with the list A temptation turned up that I could not resist I made a beeline for the park And hung out with my friends until dark By the time I realized what had happened The store was closed. I was saddened Guys! Please help me concoct a story That will diffuse my mother's fury What if you were kidnapped - by a giant with a hairy back What if you fell in a ditch - under a spell by an evil witch What if you got lost - returned by a blue and white horse What if we tell her you died - Then angels came down and cried Bringing you back alive. Miracle verified We can explain the time loss - with an alien abduction of course Bye. I'm just going to go home. And face my mom alone
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"Sam! Where have you been?" "I was trapped in a cotton gin." "Seriously. Where were you?" "Aliens took me to Kathmandu." "You know your sister saw you in the park?" "I hitched a ride back on an aardvark."
Whenever my mom sent me on an errand, I would disappear for hours. Looking back, lies rolled off my tongue way too easily, and they were always ridiculously outrageous. When confronted, I would either tell unbelievable lies or be silent. Even though I was always afraid to go home that never stopped me.
Sam

Feature Photo Credit:@j.m.bez via Twenty20
This is such a relatable post, Sam. I really enjoyed this one.
Btw, did you ever come back from your errand runs with everything that was asked?!
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Thank you Sue. When I did go, I would usually return with everything. Mostly unbroken – once, on the way back, we went for a joyride in a shopping cart and ended up tumbling. Eggs broken, one exploded milk bag along with a bunch of scrapes and bruises. Memories 🙂
The time it took for me to return depended on the season. In the wintertime it was about a 95% success rate. I’d go and come back quickly. All bets were off in the summer 🙂
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